Can someone understand me ???

Where was the person that once understand me so well.... the past few days so rocky but den it had gone by... 2morrow is another day which might just be the same... but as time goes by, the rocky road just seems to be the same usual means to everyday life...

Been working this few weeks... been saving up this few weeks... bills has all been cleared... and more bills are to come... Tired as i m... life still goes on... miss the laughter... miss the people... i hated the smile... but wanted the laughter.. can someone make me laugh ?? i feel very tired... working is tired... but atleast it makes me understand more... going to sch is tired.. but that is where i learn... going home after all that is tired... but that is a home... which was never supposed to be called home...

i wan to be alone for the time being.. can everyone leave me alone??? This is not possible... cos it wun happen... how i miss my temper... cos thats where i can feel the silent by my side... the night is lonely as it can be... but at least i can smile at the silent i receive... respect is given to me as of everyday...

Need a recorder.. to record down the words i say.. and i will understand myself even more, where of nobody can do so... i can say a word and understand the sentence... but who can understand me even if i have finished a story...

I wan receive this passion.... but den it is not being a passion...
The draw of sword is sth i fear of facing... but the moment of truth is wat everyone is waiting for... have a loving reunion and be prepare to face the den of lion....

I m a Leo.... Respect + Confidence + Quiet + Lonely + Thinker = a lonely lion....

Standing wif a broken umbrella...

Once a upon a time, there was a very rich man whose wealth was equalivant to wat of the whole town have. He wear branded stuffs and eat expensive foods and drove around in a nice luxury car. Everything was perfect for the man.

But den one day, his car broke down on a heavy raining day. It have having such a downpour that u cannot see wat so infront of your sight. What bad luck he was having, and the worst thing was that he was urgently rushing to meet someone important. Suddenly he remember that he got a umbrella behind his boot. So he quickly rushed down to check the boot. Indeed there was a umbrella, but den it was a broken one. One that have sipping water to it. But he took it and run wif it regardlessly...

On his way to his appointment, he suddenly think of his wealth and everything... Something came to his mind, something was missing in his life.... wat was missing ??? he stared at his broken umbrella.... and kept quiet.......

Things are starting to tighten up again... Project has to be amended and the main problem is , it is like redoing the whole process.... and how much time do we have?? left wif onli say 3 weeks... and my presentation is stuck halfway... report is no where to be found... and things aint really working out fine... haiz... mentally weak right now... really have to go out for some fresh air instead of stuck in this restless room for so long...

Time aint always right... really wanted to join baoquan, allister and kailong for a show yesterday... but.... haiz... nvm... things will just have to be pushed all the way back into my brain...

Today is already friday... but not much things has been done.. our project... somethings is really wrong wif the things... my partner suspects that somebody is sabotaging us... things that we were so sure that we did correctly was not been done... which is not possible cos we have a very responsible Supervisor... he will always check the thigns be4 leaving...so that is like... so unbelievable... ok.. i m being a boring freak right now.... but who cares... thigns aint right , so m i...

I wan to play basketball.... but i m too lousy to be true.... have to work 2morrow... maybe even on tuesday,.... going to take up two jobs... need a better start in life right now... tired or not... it does not matter... things has to take place... y not now....

The fire stars of the space...

hm... Shooting stars are sth many would really die to see at least one in a life time... well.. i personally seen around...< let me recall har...> i think at least 3 times... all was unexpectedly... suddenly walking a street wif a friend and looked up and saw it...haha.. Should i call it good luck or a bad omen??

Situation in diff people are sth i often tell myself to comfort and with hold the inner me... haha... like to sing a unknown lyric to myself wif diff kinds of melody that comes to me...haha... my voice so so la... but i dare to say that the lyrics and melody that comes to me are great... hahaha... simple yet nice... haha... but den onli moments of emotions will the gift be given to me...

Stars up above are moments of joy like the people on earth... onli diff is the time and space between us... our time run in seconds, mintues and hour.... but in space... the time is floating so the time seems unbelievingly long... but den would u wan a long lifespan compare to a short one ?? Qns like this will never have a ans to it...

Beliving it the truth is certain text.. and seeing it might be a proof to sth in life... but understanding the matter is the living word of humanity....

learning the meaning of thinking hard and understanding the ppl around... I wan to understand them in a way that i dun understand well.. throught heart tok and the contact wif them will show the real sight of one sides....

Often i wish ppl to understand me... but den thinking again... Y would i wan them to understand me?? understanding one can really be so cruel... the weakness of one and the confidence level of oneself... is total suicide....hahha... corny and loafly... Crap is sth that keeps human mind working... relaxing and yet thinking about the things that is going round one's mind... haha... pyschologist sia... haha...

Qoo!

haha... got myself a job liao...hahah... a handphone promoter...hehe... back to the same job again... onli diff now is... selling a hard brand...haha.. but den lucky still manage to sell...hahaha... ar bo dunno how to survive sia...hah... hm... dunno y like suddenly getting back to work liao seems more enjoying leh... though it is tired and boring to work during weekend la... but den at least can by pass time and earn some extra for myself and other things lo... hm... time for me now are bad... but luckily still know how to save so still ok ok lo... bills are pilling up, phone bills, internet bills, insurance bills and present buying sprits bills....< extra one la....hahaha > + got gf le... so must know how to save up more.... :) but den at least my gf still not so bad la... know how to think for me and not those so materialistic compare to some girls i known....hahaha...

hm.... now having big chunk of work in school... haiz.... one bad thing.... or no... two bad things... hhahaa.... cannot play basketball on sunday liao... die la... how to go for training... haiz... no more team to play liao la... hm.... better think of a good solution now sia... if not really no chance to play liao.... lose nvm... but must have the experience.... moreover the player there aint attitude givers... so it is sth GOOD....hahaha.... have to finished my thigns fast and complete everything fast and quick..... :) victory shall be wif me.....

But den some friends around me are having some problems... hope they know how to solve things clearly.... dun fret... though not there for u guys, but a phone call can be reach inregardless of where i m.... never look depress... cos that when the ppl around takes the chance to attack... proving hard to survive is the multi living life of the so call simple life.... so wat if u are a ant... so tiny... but think again... u can carry the weight multi times above your current weight... thing aint always down in life... that where ppl comes in your life to make it brighter... live it good, live it right... live your life cos it aint wat u ask for... but it is wat u can do it for..... :)

Time is a lonely path...

now listening to a chinese song... old song but dunno the title... haha.. many thing seems the same in a way or two right??? think about it.... does friends come and stay till a certain time and leave after the cup of coffee have been drank finish after maybe say... 7 years.... or maybe longer... had a friend who drank his cup of tea half finish but left eventually still.... hahaha... corny... just like as if the 10cent coin u put into the public phone had been used up after 3 min of tok... onli different is that once is gone, there is no placing of another 10 cent coin....

Maybe life is just a cheque, the amount has just be right in a way of understanding.. cos thats when the amount will be just nice... having too much aint always a good thing... slowly think about it and you might just get my idea of the topic....

Ever wonder wat a drop of raindrop can do to u ??
Imagine..... standing alone right by the side of a lonely road wif a single street lamp by your other side... suddenly a drop of rain start to fall... wat is your first reaction?? think about it seriously... be4 the second drop of rain hit on you... u might already recalling past from as far as your memories DARE to take you to.....

Dunno y certain things can make ppl feel sad as wat a friend today said.... listening to songs nowadays makes him feel emotionally sad...
I was like thinking... wat happen to him that made him felt this way... is it the things happening around him or is it him that is having a drastic thinking in life ??

Hm... well, the inner thinking of a person can never really be understand well enough by anyone.... but den again... would u dare to let someone truely understand you inside out ?? a challeague to youself that is like trying to catch the raindrop without spilling it...

Suddenly i miss someone... someone that truely understand me... even without me letting out any secret... She will know wat i m thinking ... I hate her so much..... but i miss her even more..... very much more..... Life aint really worth the fight without you by my side.....Can i feel you spirtually tonite???

the weak side of me is showing out to the complete darkness of my room.... the walls are the strongest support but den yet the most cruel thing that i can face...

Take me with you ..... i being so alone...... smiles has been carrying around in the morning while tears being dropping silently at nite....

I miss you....... the song i m listening... and the feeling i m right now....
Would you bring me wif you ???

wat for supper ???

well... well.. well... back from a relaxing walk, chat and makan session.... ahhaha... wif my lovely gf... hahaa..wondered how she felt... haha... haiz... such a poor thing.. that is i meant me....

hahaha.... y leh... cos someone order indian rojak leh.... haha... sounds not bad hor??? ahhah... guess wat was on the dish??? hahaha... 4 balls of BREAD ....haha... ok la..still got onions and cuecumber la...hahaha... diao diao diao lo... ahaha.. bread for supper sia... and wif chilli... haha... buay tahan....

not bad not bad.... friday is coming... heheheh.... looking forward to it.... hehehe.... morning till evening go to sch for project... haiz... sad case... lol... but den after that pei gf from evening till nite time lo... haha... den after that is nite activity wif friends from my class.... hehehe.... Ray , Andy,Wilson + Me... hahaha.... Ray is the tang sen... haha.. Andy is Sun Wu Kong , Wilson is erm..... and i m....dunno wat is the name leh...hahah...

Go and search for treasure instead of going to the east... ahhahah... lame leh... lol... alright la... sat and sun still need to go and work... headache... stupid phone sia.. dunno how to use it well leh... think going to stand there and be a nice vase....heheeheh

thinking.......

Been thinking alot these few days, had been quietly thinking about the past behaviour of mine... seems so different... wat is really going on in my mind den?? closing my eyes and listening carefully to the noise of the crickets can really motivate someone to reflect hard on the things that went on recently.... maybe life is just full of scenario....
People around are having problems in certain way.... so does any body else... Project is starting to look more problematic.... project report and presentation again.... haiz... have to struggle it through by myself... my partner is not familiar wif english so have to help him as much as i can in the report.. but den i think i really need some brain to think wif me cos ideas are limited due to the same routines nowadays... nth seems to really fasinate me...

was like really thinking back alot sia... like things happened in a way that really needed to cool down and think properly... though it does not seems that bad... but really have to sort myself out and really understand the situation and not bringing forward the feeling in me... really really have to get over it liao....

Claps are so rewarding... words are like wonders.... been a long time since i heard praises from ppl about my basketball.... been a long time......

hm... have to understand

hm.... had a slight tok to a friend... in a r/s really have to give and take... cannot always take nia... den at times really have to stand in each other shoes and think for them sia... hm.... having a r/s does not mean everything.... there is a limit to wat a family can do for u and also the same apply to friendship and a r/s.. there is always a limit to certain things... if at times.. he / she cannot be there for u, it is the same as a friendship... if he / she need you to help but u cannot... den we just have to do it ourselve... hm... quite true sia.. if not collapse like that... really dui bu qi ourselve... hm....

~ ~

Where am i ?? Far far away.... distanced away.... feelin so dead.... where is my emotion?? motionless... dead.... monotone.... wat is it ?? i really need a vacation away from everyone..... Felt so unwanted... trash... rubbish.... shit.... i wan to fly..... can anyone help me ?? i need a helping hand.... feel like crashing down.... but where can i crash onto?? i wan to fly high up............

The Mood of The Sea ~ ~

UP and down, Down and Up.... thats the rythem of the sea and seems almost identical to me... calm at times and rough at times... how will anyone set sail and have the confidence of returning safely ??

It may seems so romantic looking at the sunset by the sea, but the storm at the other end may be the end of someone's life...but den so as to say...when there are danger, there will always be someone willing to risk their life for other...

Ever wondered y a snail cannot swim or float in the sea ??
Simple ans : It does not belong there...
But den there are sea snails which survive only in sea water. Same characterisic wif of the those on land.. Crawling and Crawling within alone, slowly and slowly getting ahead no matter wat... Strongest surviver i would say....

Well if there is a strongest surviver, there would surely be a weakest living sea creature... hahaha... have a guess.... which is the weakest creature i am thinking right now... haha........ simple... a sea horse...
y ?? cos half of it's life, it is clinging to a sea weed or sth.. The current is too strong for it to move freely... but it has a brain that works so much better den the snail... but y is it so ??
Search the ans and tell me... hahaha

=) (",)

I have encountered many different turns in life and HONOUR to say that, i survived deals of them... that y here i stand... A sea with a strong current, yet being polluted by oil and wastes....

I am a strong looking sea with weakness is unseen through naked eye..... slowly dying off the pollution without anyone knowing...

The sea that onces was beautiful and would make ppl smile and laugh unknowingly is so much gone.... but endlessly the sea is still going Up and down.... splashing onto the sand..... the sun is still shining upon me and thus i will survive... but who can really calm the sea and set sail.... throwing thrash and polluting wun help....
I love the sea.....
The piture of a girl smiling by the sea side.....

how peaceful are the days ??

kana screwed by my assesser this afternoon during my presentation... ask me a stupid Qns... how much are the tolerants??? 0.9 mircon la... kaoz... cannot even see it wif your eye lo.... still dare to say if all add up den wun it be a big difference... IDIOT HAR .... even all add up also less den 0.01 mm lo... kaoz... BITCH SIA.... act friendly den started things like that... kaoz...

confirm is a MISS lo... yucks... hated it sia... sucks... one of the worse day in this IPG lab.... imagine i m going to see her again on another 6 weeks later... freak la... say so much also no use... will just ask me stupid Qns... still correct my pronouning of words... KAOZ>>>>>... i just never say a S la... bitch... if u really wan to be so precise den go and be english teacher la... kaoz... lame..

fine... things aint right at the moment... the words are been said... the things have been done... the talk have gone pass... action are the key... but where are the door... can anyone find it ??

My story....

A friend of mine has his blog been violated by others about the things he said... well i do not have a tag box... so it should be alright...

HA...HA... gee... had a bad day i guess... Just got into a serious quarrel wif my gf... been having bad communication... or should i said understanding between the 2 of us have been mild... different needs between the two of us in this r/s.... just like the same song been sung by different ppl... the different effect and affect the different ppl... just now was like losing my cool... was a long time... was totally freak out sia.... maybe the understanding is deeply needed between us... well... is there a solution out of this ??

gee... at times like this... really wan friends and tell me that nvm de... will pass by very quickly de... you all can settle this one... forgive and forget.. but den... if all these words really word... den y do i need friends at all?? i know all that by heart.... my hand are toking right now... the brain is dead at the moment and my heart is still beating no matter wat... or is it feeling the twisting of sth crampling on it... wat feeling is that ?? maybe i should just go for some exercise these few days... been feeling sick these few days...

Cannot imagine how things turn out so sudden... my gal was still by my side caring for me cos i was sick.... and today we are having a major quarrel..... over ME and YOU.... haha... of cos it is between us... the heart is still pumping.....

gee...

i m sick.... arh... but lucky for me... my dear was there all the way to accompanying me home and wif me till nite fall.. thank you my love... MUACK ~ ~